Weekend at Bernie’s

 

Everything is summer. Summertime. Summer nights. Summer fun. Summer camp. Summer love. But what’s more summer than a summer movie? The classics abound. Dirty Dancing. Jaws. Stand By Me. Do the Right Thing. Dazed and Confused. Grease. The Endless Summer.

If at, say, a summer party, someone pressed me to pick one picture that is the most summer, I would answer, diplomatically, nonchalantly, it’s impossible to choose. But if I was two drinks in, I’d approach the nearest reveler and say, THE summer movie is Weekend at Bernie’s!

For those who don’t know, Weekend at Bernie’s is a comedy released in 1989 about Larry and Richard, a couple of accountants who uncover fraud in their company and are rewarded with a summer weekend at Bernie’s house in the Hamptons. Unfortunately, Bernie ends up dead and the only way the Larry and Richard won’t end up dead is if everyone thinks Bernie’s not dead. The entire film is Larry and Richard and a dead Bernie.

There are other movies out there with an inconvenient corpse: The Trouble with Harry. Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead. Clue (has a few of them). Vacation. Little Miss Sunshine. But these flicks have other things going on. The stiff in these flicks is more of a prop. Bernie, however, is actually, kind of, a character.

Look, I’m no expert on rigor mortis. Frankly, I not even sure that’s how you spell it, but I’m prepared to suspend disbelief – not indefinitely but, if the jokes are good enough, at least for a weekend.

Andrew McCarthy, a founding member of the “brat pack” plays Larry, and Jonathan Silverman plays Richard. Their performances and chemistry are solid and funny. But Terry Kisser, who plays Bernie, steals the show. When he’s alive, Kisser’s Bernie is a bit cartoonish, tonally appropriate but nothing special. But as a dead man… Terry Kisser IS Bernie. As a dead man… Terry Kisser really sings. As a dead man… Terry Kisser’s performance of Bernie Lomax might be the single best dead man in the history of cinema.

The first night, Bernie has a house party, and his self-important guests roll through, helping themselves to his liquor. A lesser screenwriter would have Bernie as a passed-out drunk. Oh, no. Bernie’s guests assume he’s just very relaxed, aloof. One guest is negotiating to buy Bernie’s car for as little scratch as possible but when Bernie won’t sell, the guest keeps upping his offer. Another guest sits on Bernie’s hand, accusing him of goosing her, calling him “insatiable”. Bernie’s affluent, pretentious guests are perfectly capable having both sides of the “conversation”, supplying both question and answer, point and counterpoint. It’s funny because it’s true. It’s sad for the same reason.

There’s a great runner about Paulie, the hitman, who, by his own admonition, is a bit rusty. But Paulie kills Bernie without a hitch except then Paulie sees Bernie up and around (he doesn’t know he’s dead) – the life of the party, water skiing, golf carting, jogging, etc. so Paulie assumes Bernie’s still alive and kills him again. Then again and again.

There is a toupee. Remember when toupees were funny?

Poolside in the morning after the party, Larry is beating Bernie at Monopoly. Larry might be cheating but then again, Bernie’s luck has run out. Larry pulls a string attached to Bernie’s wrist enabling Bernie to “wave” to passersby.

There is a serpentine gag where a boat goes around the buoys and Bernie, hitherto bodysurfing behind, clonks into each and every one of them. The key to this kind of joke is figuring out exactly how many buoys a cadaver can hit before the gag itself dies.

The film isn’t perfect. The scene where an old flame enjoys a romp with Bernie is a bridge too far. Even if you’re six sheets to the wind and might miss a pulse or your partner’s shortness of breath, wouldn’t you notice the absence of a certain core body temperature? Mercifully, this sequence is short, forgive and forgettable.

So, guest at the summer party who never asked, Weekend at Bernie’s is the most summer of all summer movies. You start with your feet in a kiddie pool. Then you’re on the beach, in a boat, at the pool, the life of the party. Yes, you have a dead guy with you the whole way but Bernie’s the most fun dead guy you’ll ever meet! The film is fun, light. It’s true enough. Back in the day the film was a hit and has since developed a bit of a cult following. But then they attempted a sequel. And, well, summer doesn’t last forever.