As January draws to a close, for many of us our New Year’s Resolutions fell by the wayside in a single moment. Does this sound like you? Did you resolve to lose weight, eat healthier, go to the gym every day, become more successful at managing money/working/parenting, quit smoking, quit drinking pop, quit caffeine, quit something so you can be the person you really want to be? And then on that one day you had a slip up and fell back into the old ways and habits.
Ninety percent of us fail to keep our New Year’s resolutions. With that comes guilt, shame, selfdoubt, and the feeling that we haven’t the willpower to change. Just from that one moment of weakness, that one slip up and you feel defeated. Your willpower deflated.
Willpower is not having strength to resist temptation, it’s the ability to do what you really want to do when part of you really doesn’t want to do it. The conundrum is in the face of your immediate desires remembering what you really want, your bigger goals.
If you’ve suspected that you run out of willpower as the day wears on, you’re right! Willpower is often highest in the morning because the brain is refreshed by sleep. When you are tired or sleep-deprived aka low on energy, it’s especially hard to ignore distractions, impulses, that sabotage our willpower. Willpower lives on rest, energy, focus, and self-control. Just like exercising tires out and depletes muscles, decision, distractions, and stressors throughout the day tire out willpower.
Here are a few tools to help sustain energy, focus, and self-control throughout the day to keep willpower working for you.
A single espresso: Caffeine gets a bad rap, blamed for energy crashes or over caffeinated jitters. But in its simplest form— tea or coffee—and in reasonable doses, caffeine can actually reduce stress. Several studies show that small doses can balance your sense of calm and sense of being alert. The result is your willpower tank is replenished.
Zzzzs: Taking a power nap during the day recharges your brain, thus replenishing your willpower tank. A mid-day “power nap” can reverse the usual willpower brain drain from morning to night. Naps also reduce stress, improve mood, and restore focus.
Snack: Who hasn’t stuck to their healthy food choices all day long and then goes to the grocery store, leaves and proceeds to eat the entire bag of chips, or box of cereal, or loaf of bread? One reason willpower runs out is because it takes a lot of energy. It you are low on food fuel you’ll be low on willpower. Studies show that when blood sugar drops, your brain is less able to focus and control impulses. Eat a snack that provides lasting energy (some protein or high-quality carbs).
Self-compassion: While we all give in and fall off the New Year’s resolution wagon from time to time, berating and shaming ourselves into getting back on course may actually be counterproductive. When you say negative things about yourself you eventually start to believe them and then willpower doesn’t have a chance. If you want to have more willpower, you have to learn to be forgiving to yourself and remember you are human too. So get back up and let go of equating self-control with self-criticism. Forgiveness can boost motivation. Forgiveness also gives permission to return to trying to be the person you want to be.
Next time your energy is waning or you haven’t had enough sleep, or even when you’ve been too busy to eat and temptation is lurking, stop what you are tempted to do and switch your focus to refill your willpower tank first. You might be surprised.
Each month a local mental health therapist will discuss an area of mental health. This week’s contributor is Sherri Moe, MS Psychotherapist.
Leave a Reply