How do we help people with dementia to feel included and maintain their independence? Learning effective communication is key. People with Alzheimer’s or other forms of dementia may have difficulty with words. They may have trouble following a conversation, lose their train of thought, or repeat themselves. Patience, understanding and good listening skills can make a huge difference in communicating with a person with dementia. While the disease affects each person differently and progresses over time, here are some tips that can make it go better for both you and the individual.
In the early stages of the disease, take time to find out how they are doing. Listen to how they are feeling and what they need. Give them extra time to respond. Don’t interrupt them or finish sentences unless he or she asks for help. Explore which method of communication is most comfortable for the person. This could include face-to-face conversations, email or phone calls. It’s okay to laugh with them. It can lighten the mood and make communication easier. Be honest and frank about your feelings. Don’t pull away; your friendship and support are important.
The middle stage of Alzheimer’s is typically the longest and can last for many years. As the disease progresses, the person will have greater difficulty communicating and will require more direct care. It is helpful to maintain a calm presence. Try to engage the person one-on-one in a quiet space with few distractions. Maintain eye contact, at their level. Talk slowly and clearly in an easy-going, pleasant manner.
Speak in short, simple sentences. Use familiar words and concrete terms. For example, say “Hand me the red hat on the shelf ” rather than “Give me that.” Limit choices and try to use yes/ no and either/or questions. Instead of asking “What would you like to do today?” ask, “Would you like to go for a walk, or watch a movie?” Break a request into small, easy steps. Give visual cues. Point or touch the item you want the individual to use. If they are stuck, begin the next step for the person.
Allow up to 20 seconds for a response so the person can think about what he or she wants to say. Be patient and supportive. Avoid correcting or calling attention to repetitive comments. Listen for the meaning or feeling. Repeat what was said to clarify. Written notes can be helpful when a spoken word seems confusing.
Avoid conflict or arguing. If you don’t agree, let it be. Find a way to join their reality (if it’s not hurting anyone), or distract them.
As the disease advances, the person with Alzheimer’s may rely on nonverbal communication, such as facial expressions or vocal sounds. Even at this late stage, treat the person with dignity and respect. Avoid talking down to the person or as if he or she isn’t there. Approach the person from the front and identify yourself. Encourage nonverbal communication. If you don’t understand what is being said, ask the person to point or gesture.
Sometimes the emotions being expressed are more important than what is being said. Look for the feelings behind words or sounds. Use touch, sights, sounds, smells and tastes as a form of communication with the person. Pictures and music can be great ways to interact.
It’s okay if you don’t know what to do or say; your presence and friendship are most important to the person.
For more information about effective communication, visit the Alzheimer’s Association website. You can find the link and other information there.
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